Know Your Stars A La DBZ
by Moondalian
Summary: This is my version of "Know your Stars" with the DBZ characters. Watch how I 'interview' the characters and discover some secrets while of course embarresing them. -:DISCONTINUED:-
1. Chapter 01: Son Goku

**Hello everybody! This is my version of know your stars and it's all about the DBZ characters. The first chapter is pretty short so if you want the next ones to be longer you'll have to help me with ideas. Also, this fic has been up on my account before but it got deleted and I have absolutely no idea why. If you see anything wrong or against the rules just tell me in a review and I can change it and don´t report cuz then I still won't know what I did wrong and that's not really helpful. Have fun!**

Goku walked onto stage and saw a chair. He was kinda tired because he'd been training all day long so he sat down. His mistake.

"Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars!" My evil little voice said in a row.

Goku looked around him to see were the voice was coming from.

"Hello? Who's there?" Goku asked.

"San Goku… he hates martial arts." I said.

"Huh? No I don't. I love martial arts." Goku said.

"Then why do you have 'I hate martial arts' t-shirts in your closet?" I asked.

"I don't have that sort of t-shirts." Goku said confused.

A t-shirt fell down from the ceiling with a 'I hate martial arts' print on it. Goku caught it and looked at it.

"This isn't mine." He said confused.

"Riiiiiiight. San Goku… he hates Chi-chi." I continued.

"No I don't. I just don't love her." Goku said. "Oops… I hope Chi-chi didn't hear that."

Chi-chi ran on stage and slapped Goku in the face. "I thought you loved me!" Then ran of stage again.

"What the… What's she doing here?" Goku asked.

"Does it matter? San Goku… he wants to destroy the earth." I continued.

"No I don't! I love the earth!" Goku said getting ticked off.

"Sure you do. And we're really gonna believe that." I said. "Let's move on. San Goku… he's really Mickey Mouse."

Goku looked up at the ceiling.

"Where do you get this stuff? They're all lies." Goku said.

"I get it off the internet!" I said excitedly. A computer appears out of nowhere on stage. Goku looks at the screen and sees the site: ' this a real site?" He asked.

"Yeah and I made it! Cool huh?" I said hyper.

"Riiiiiiiiiiiiight." Goku muttered.

"San Goku AKA Mickey Mouse… he's really in love with Bulma." I said.

Bulma ran on stage and hugged Goku.

"I knew you loved me!" She exclaimed.

"No I don't!" Goku said as he tried to get free.

"You don't? YOU JERK!" Bulma said as she slapped Goku in the face, then ran of stage.

"Okaaaaaaaaaaaaay. San Goku AKA Mickey Mouse… he has a kid with android 18." I said.

"WHAT!" Goku yelled.

Krillin ran on stage with Maron.

"How could you Goku! I thought you were my friend!" Krillin yelled.

"So you're my daddy? YAY! I can transform into a Super Saiyan!" Maron screeched.

"No! It's not true!" Goku yelled but Krillin turned his back to him and left together with Maron.

"You're a worthless husband Goku. To both of your wives. San Goku AKA Mickey Mouse… he knows Vegeta is stronger than him." I said.

"No he's not." Goku said irritated.

Vegeta ran on stage and started crying: "But I wanna be stronger!"

"Errr… Vegeta? You're kinda scaring me now…" Goku said sweat dropping.

"So I'm stronger?" Vegeta asked hopeful.

"No." Goku answered.

Vegeta ran of stage again still crying.

"Moving on now. San Goku AKA Mickey Mouse… he didn't want Goten to be born." I said.

"Yeah. Chi-chi wanted another one." Goku muttered.

Goten ran on stage crying.

"WHY? WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME? I'm going to find a father that does love me!" He said crying, then ran of stage again. Goku sweat dropped.

"You're not only a worthless husband but also a worthless father Goku." I said.

"Would you stop telling all these lies!" Goku yelled at the ceiling.

"Why does everybody look up at the ceiling! I'm not up there! That's just where the speakers are." I said annoyed.

Goku sweat dropped. "Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight."

"Anyways, San Goku AKA Mickey Mouse… he's going to wish back Frieza and take over the universe with him." I said.

"NO I'M NOT GONNA DO THAT!" Goku yelled angrily.

"Now you know San Goku AKA Mickey Mouse, the worthless husband and father, who loves Bulma and thinks Vegeta is stronger than him." I said as my voice disappeared

"NO THEY DON'T! THEY DON'T KNOW ANYTHING OF ME! HEY! COME BACK YOU! I'M NOT DONE WITH YOU YET!" Goku yelled as he ran of stage to find me but of course failing cause my contract says that I can't be found unless I want to. Gee.. I don't wanna see Goku right now. What a shame.

**So? What did you think? Good? Bad? Cookie? Hmm… Cookie! I'm gonna go get one! Anybody else want one? Yes, (throws cookies at all the readers) here you go! Anyways, Please R&R and give me ideas people. The next one is… VEGETA! This is gonna be fun. (Smirks evilly as Vegeta gulps)**


	2. Chapter 02: Vegeta

**Hey there people! Here I am again with another chap of my fic! I wanna thank all the people who reviewed and gave me ideas for this chapter. I was really surprised that I got so many reviews and I believe this is my most popular fic! °does happy dance° uhm… forget u saw that will you? Well, have fun!**

Vegeta walked up on stage trying to find where Goku had gone. He looked around and saw a chair. He was getting sick and tired of looking for Goku so he decided to sit down and wait for him. I guess I have a new victim.

"Know you stars, know stars, know your stars!" I said as Vegeta sat down.

"Vegeta… he loves pink." I said.

"What? How dare you say that!" Vegeta said annoyed.

"Well you wore a pink shirt during the Future Trunks Saga." I replied. (thanx ShadowPrincess-Shekailaia for the idea)

"WHAT! BULMA MADE ME WEAR THAT!" Vegeta exclaimed.

"Sure. You go and believe that. Vegeta… he eats little children." I said. (Thanx daggie19 for the idea)

Vegeta stared at the ceiling dumbstuck. "What?"

"You heard me. I wonder how Trunks survived with you around." I wondered.

"I DO NOT EAT LITTLE CHILDREN!" Vegeta yelled.

"Uh huh. Riiiiiiiiiight. Let's just go on shall we. Vegeta… he loves Goku." I continued.

Goku ran on stage.

"Eeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwww." Goku said. "I don't love you that way!"

Chi-chi ran on stage as well.

"If you dare to touch my husband I'm gonna kill you." She snapped.

"I DON'T LOVE KAKAROT! I'M NOT EVEN FRIENDS WITH HIM!" Vegeta yelled.

Goku ran of stage looking a tad green. Chi-chi followed.

"Who are you? Show yourself so I can blast you into the next dimension!" Vegeta exclaimed at the ceiling.

"I don't wanna. Vegeta… he still sleeps with a teddybear." I said.

"Yes and his name is… I mean, NO I DON'T!" Vegeta yelled.

Bulma ran on stage with a pink teddybear in her arms.

"But Vegeta. Of course you do. Here's Mister plushie." Bulma said handing him the bear. Vegeta hugged the bear. Then Trunks ran on stage.

"Ah dad, you're humiliating me!" He exclaimed.

Backstage Goku burst into laughter. Vegeta looked at the teddybear and realized what he was doing.

"AAAAAHHHHHHHH!" He yelled as he threw away the bear.

Bulma picked the bear up and left the stage after saying: "I'll put it in our bed where it belongs." Trunks went with her.

"………Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaay. To much information. Vegeta… he's really a ballerina." I said.

"NO I'M NOT!" Vegeta yelled very ticked off.

"Then why do I have pictures." I said as pictures floated down from the ceiling. Vegeta looked at them.

"I really meant to put these away." Vegeta muttered.

"That would have been a smart idea. Vegeta… he watches soaps all the time and cries at every event." I said. **(Thank you yunazg for your idea.)**

"But it's so sad when they break up and Amanda still has to get that Troy is cheating on her with Gloria!" Vegeta started rambling.

"Okay okay okay Vegeta! We get it! It's all very sad but SHUT UP NOW! I'm supposed to be the one torturing you, not the other way around. Vegeta… he's really Coyote from Roadrunner." I said.

"No I'm not!" Vegeta exclaimed.

"Sure. Vegeta AKA Coyote… he's always known Goku is stronger than him." I said.

"NO HE'S NOT!" Vegeta yelled pouting. "BULMA! SHE'S PICKING ON ME!"

Bulma ran on stage and comforted Vegeta.

"There there Vegeta. It's all gonna be alright. Mister Plushie is waiting for you at home." She said.

Backstage, Goku burst into laughter again.

"WOULD YOU STOP LAUGHING KAKAROT!" Vegeta snapped.

Bulma walked off stage again and Goku appeared.

"Hey Vegeta. Mister Plushie is on fire backstage." He said smirking.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! NOT MISTER PLUSHIE!" Vegeta yelled.

Goku disappeared again.

"……… Again, to much information. Now you know Vegeta AKA Coyote, the famous ballerina who loves Goku that still sleeps with his pink teddybear that's currently on fire backstage." I said as my voice disappeared.

Vegeta ran off stage yelling: "DON'T WORRY MISTER PLUSHIE! I'LL SAVE YOU!"

**That was the second chapter. Hope you all enjoyed it people. The next chapter will be Gohan so help me by sending in those ideas! Untill the next time.**


	3. Chapter 03: Son Gohan

**Moondalian: Heeeeeeelloooooo people. I just wanted to thank everybody who reviewed and gave me ideas. I also wanna say that GOHAN'S MINE! EVERYBODY STAY AWAY FROM HIM!**

**Readers: He's with Videl.**

**Moondalian: He just doesn't know he loves me and not her yet.**

**Readers: °Sweat drop°**

**Moondalian: Well anyway, let's start the fic.**

**Chapter 03: Teen Gohan**

My next victim walked on stage.

"HEY WAIT! THAT'S GOHAN! I CAN'T INSULT GOHAN! I LOVE HIM! I WANT EXTRA MONEY!"

°A bag full of money is thrown at me°.

"YAY! NOW I CAN DO IT! Know your stars know your stars know your stars."

Gohan looked at the ceiling. "Who's there?" He asked

"I'm Leila and I'm your biggest fan!" I squeeled. "I'm going to tortu- I mean interview you."

Gohan sweat dropped. "Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight"

"Son Gohan… He wears his mother's dresses. Why do you do that Gohan?" I asked.

"I was 5!" Gohan exclaimed.

"Yes and you looked very cute." I said.

"How do you know?" Gohan asked.

"I HAVE PICTURES!" I said hyper.

Gohan sweat dropped.

"Son Gohan… he wears make-up." I said. "Do me a favour and don't wear any make-up on the date your taking me on."

"I DON'T WEAR ANY MAKE-UP! And what date!" Gohan exclaimed.

"The one your taking me on after I'm done with all the tortu- I mean interviews."

"I don't even know you! And I'm already dating Videl!" Gohan snapped.

"So you're cheating on Videl for me? You should really break up with her." I said seriously.

"I'm not cheating on Videl and I'm not breaking with her either!" Gohan yelled.

"Sure, keep telling yourself that. Son Gohan… he still wets the bed. EEEEEEWWWWW!" I screeched.

"Would you stop telling lies! I DON'T WET THE BED!" Gohan yelled.

"Are you sure?" I asked suspiciously.

"YES!" Gohan yelled pissed off.

"Good. Son Gohan… he's not really a Saiyan. He just pretends he is." I said.

"What? Then why is it that I can transform into a super Saiyan?" Gohan asked with a smug look on his face.

"Hair gel, contact lenses and stuff to make your hair blonde." I said as the smug look on Gohan's face turned into an irritated one. Then his face lit up again.

"Why hasn't anyone ever seen me do that?" He asked.

"Because you were a student of Guldo's and he taught you how you could stop time." I said.

Gohan looked like he was about to blow a fuse.

"I DID NOT!" He yelled at the ceiling.

"Prove it." I said smirking even though no one could see.

"How?" Gohan asked.

"I dunno. That's your problem." I said shrugging. "Let's move on now. Son Gohan… he didn't really beat Cell. He asked Hercule to do it. I would've never guessed that you were weaker than Hercule." I said in a mocking way.

"I AM NOT WEAKER THAN HERCULE AND I DID BEAT CELL!" Gohan yelled.

He yelled so loud that the studio started to shake.

"Chill out Gohan." I said. "You're gonna wreck the studio if you go on like this. Not even Vegeta did that."

"You did this to Vegeta?" Gohan asked calming down.

"Yeah. Found out some really interesting things about him even though I didn't really wanted to know all of these things."

That got Gohan's attention.

"Like what?" He asked smirking and getting a note book.

"Wouldn't you like to know." I said grinning.

"Ah come on!" Gohan pleaded.

"Nope. Son Gohan… his idol is Captain Ginyu. Then why did you study under Guldo and not Ginyu?" I asked curiously. (Thanks Shadowprincess-Shekailaia for the idea)

"I did NOT study under Guldo and Ginyu is NOT my idol!" Gohan snapped.

"Then what about those poses while you were being Saiyaman? Oh I get it! You must've graduated from the fine school of Ginyu Poses!" I said.

"What! Those guys don't have anywhere near as good moves as me!" Gohan exclaimed.

"Really?" °Watches Ginyu posing in Ginyu Saga and then watches Gohan posing in Saiyaman Saga° "Cause to me it looks as if you used all Ginyu's ridiculous poses from the first time you tried to be Saiyaman." I said thoughtfully.

"Will you get off that!" Gohan growled.

"Fine, Son Gohan… He loves to play with Vegeta's teddy bear when he's not looking." I said.

°Vegeta runs on stage° "How dare the spawn of Kakarot even consider touching my Mister Plushie!" He exclaimed.

"Vegeta, she's lying! I wouldn't be caught dead with any dumb bear!" Gohan exclaimed back.

"Then explain those teddy bear undies." I noted.

"Ugh…" Gohan growled as he blushed and turned red.

"Ì think that pretty much says it all, don't you?" I said smirking.

Vegeta nodded and walked off stage. (Thanx Fallen Angellll586 for both ideas.)

Let's continue shall we. Son Gohan… he died Hercules hair pink. Gohan, just because you couldn't beat Cell doesn't mean you have to die Hercules hair pink. It's not his fault he's stronger and you we're the one that asked him to do it." I said. **(Thanx **Beeku** for the idea.)**

"I DID NOT DIE HERCULES HAIR PINK… though I'd like to do it." Gohan added with a smirk, then remembered what I had said, "AND I BEAT CELL! NOT HIM!"

Sure Gohan, keep dreaming. Son Gohan… his father is jealous with him." I said.

"Really? Well I am the smartest one aroung." Gohan bragged.

Goku ran on stage, "That's not true! I'm not jealous! Why should I be jealous of my own, don't-know-how-I-made-him, son! It's ridiculous!" Goku exclaimed.

"Dad, you really don't know how you made me? Let me explain: It starts with…" Gohan started.

Goku covered his eyes, "I don't wanna hear it. Lalalalalala." He ran off stage, still covering his ears.

"O…kay… Moveing on. Son Gohan… He still watches the powerpuffgirls." I said.

"Yeah! It's so awesome when Bubbles, Buttercup and Blossom fly through the air to defeat the evil Mojo-jojo!" Gohan said excitedly. (Thanx Karai for both ideas.)

I sweat dropped. Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay. Let's leave it at that people. Now you know Son Gohan, the Powerpuffgirl watching, cheating, make-up and dress wearing not real Saiyan, who studied under Guldo yet idolizes Ginyu and graduated from the fine school of Ginyu poses." I said as my voice faded away and Gohan flew around the stage pretending to be Blossom of the Powerpuffgirls.

"I shall defeat you Mojo-jojo!" He yelled as he flew off stage.

**Moondalian: Well that's it for this chapter. Hope you all liked it. The next one will be, as requested by **Shadowprincess-Shekailaia, **Piccolo! Review and give me those ideas!**


	4. Chapter 04: Piccolo

**Hello folks! I'm back with a new chapter of the fic you all know and love. I hope you all enjoy reading it as much as I did while writing it. Also, there will be 2 co-hosts in this chapter and one of them, Nalurah, will be co-hosting every other chapter with me from now on. Hope you all enjoy and of course, R&R!**

**Chapter 04: Piccolo**

Our all time favourite grumpy Namek walked on stage. He sat in the chair because… uhm, well I don't know why but he just did.

"Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars." My voice rang out.

Piccolo looked up at the ceiling with a bored look on his face, "A ceiling that talks?" He questioned.

"No, the speakers are only up there you Baka!" I said grumpily, "Piccolo… he's nauseous all the time." I started.

Piccolo raised an eyebrow, "I am not," he said.

"Then explain the green skin," I pointed out.

"I'm a Namek… what did you expect," he grumbled.

"That's just a cover. Just admit it," I said accusingly.

"Whatever. What do you want from me."

"I'm gonna interview you and to do that, I'm gonna introduce my 2 co-hosts for this chapter. Let me introduce you to: Nalurah and Marianne (FallenAngel111586)." I introduced.

"Hey guys, I'm not for small talks so lets start the tortu- I mean interview!" Nalurah's voice said.

"I totally agree with you. Can I start?" Marianne asked.

"Be our guest." Nalurah and Leila said.

"Piccolo, Piccolo, Piccolo is jealous of Gohan's fashion sense." Marianne said.  
"No I'm not! That Saiyaman outfit is ridiculous and that kid always dressed up like me as a child! If anyone's jealous it's him!" Piccolo said.

"Right, and I'm the queen of Planet Vegeta." Marianne mocked.  
°Vegeta comes on stage°  
"You're not my mommy." He whined.  
"I was being sarcastic." Marianne said sweatdropping.  
"Oh..." Vegeta said.  
"Actually i'm Trunks's girlfriend." Marianne said smirking.  
"What!" Vegeta exclaimed.  
Just kidding." Marianne said.  
"Thank Kami!" Vegeta thanked.  
"I'm realy Bras' girlfriend." Marianne smirk widened.  
°Vegeta passes out°  
"Hey, Leila, can you get him out of here. I can't insult Piccolo with Vegeta on stage." Marianne whined.

"Don't care, deal with it." I said as I tried to hold back my laughter.  
"Fine! Anyways, on with the tor- I mean interview." Marianne corrected. "Piccolo, Piccolo, Piccolo... is gay."  
"No I'm not! Don't go projecting your own lifestyle on to me. I'm asexual." Piccolo exclaimed.  
"Of course you are. You're asexual being who's gay." Marianne explained.  
° Piccolo's face turned red like a tomato° "I am not gay!"  
"You're just in denial. I've seen the way you look at Gohan, Goku, and Dende. anyways, where was I..." Marianne thought out loud.

"Where the hell are Leila and that other co-host!" Piccolo demanded.  
"They're taking a break. I am the one you should worry about." Marianne smirked. "Piccolo, Piccolo, Piccolo... Wishes to gather all of the dragonballs and bring Frieza back to life."  
"What! This interview is rediculous. Where the hell are you?" Piccolo yelled.  
"I'm the bimbo in the first row, seat 13." Marianne said innocently.  
°Piccolo heads to first row seat 13 and knocks a female unconscious.°  
° Marianne smirks° "Idiot! I'm not foolish enough to tell you where I am. Now let's continue. Piccolo, Piccolo, Piccolo Is realy frieza's twin brother."  
°Vegeta wakes up from offstage° "I knew it!" °Passes out again.° "Oh, Piccolo you'll like this one. Apparently Bra needs a ride to the mall so I'm gonna allow Leila and Nalurah to finish you off. later." °Vanishes°

"Always nice to start a job with a break." Nalurah said.

"You're just lazy." I said rolling my eyes. "Anyway, now that Marianne is gone, we can start the fun."

"Oh yeah!" Nalurah cheered.

"I'll let you do the honour." I said.

"Why thank you. Piccolo… he took ballet lessons from Vegeta." Nalurah started.

"NO I DIDN'T!" Piccolo yelled.

"I have pictures! °throws down pictures of Piccolo and Vegeta in a tutu° Oh, sexy." Nalurah said sarcastic.

°Piccolo turned red°

"I think that says it all. Piccolo… He wears pink bunny pyjama's." Nalurah continued.

"I DO NOT!" Piccolo yelled.

"Do I have to show ALL the pictures I have? 'Cause that's going to take a while." Nalurah said.

Piccolo stayed quiet.

"Anyway, Piccolo… He's always wished that he was born pink instead of green. So that's why you wear the pink bunny pyjama's!" Nalurah said understanding.

"I HATE PINK!" Piccolo exclaimed.

"WHY does everybody have to be in denial. Man! Grow up!" Nalurah said irritated.

"Easy Nalurah, or else I'll take over." I said.

"Oh shut up Leila! Where was I? Oh yeah! Piccolo… he has a secret affair with Chichi behind Goku's back." Nalurah said. "How dare you Piccolo!"

°Goku ran on stage°

"How could you Piccolo! I thought you were my friend!" Then ran off stage again. Piccolo stared at the spot Goku was only seconds ago. He blinked once… he blinked twice… "Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight."

"Oh wait. I was wrong. He used Chichi to get to Goku because he's actually in love with Goku." Nalurah corrected herself.

"Yeah, he's so hot… °dreamy look on face° Wait! What am I saying?" Piccolo said with wide eyes.

"You just admitted you love Goku which means you really are gay." Nalurah said smirking. "Hmm, I'm gonna go tell Marianne that she was right about you being gay! I'll be back for next chapter. Bye Leila! Have fun! °runs away°"

"Don't worry, I will." I said smirking evilly.

"Is this gonna be a normal interview from now on?" Piccolo said hopefully.

"Heck no! That would be boring. Piccolo… he took Mister Plushie hostage and blasted him to smithereens just to get on Vegeta's nerves." I said.

°Vegeta woke up yet again° "NOOOOOOOOO! NOT MISTER PLUSHIE! HOW DARE YOU HARM MY SWEET INNOCENT MISTER PLUSHIE!" Vegeta whined like a little girl.

°I knock him unconscious again° "SHUT UP VEGETA! Anyway, Piccolo…He's not a Namekian, he's one of those little green men from Mars! Actually, I think he played a major part in Mars Attacks! That movie was kinda strange though... I know what you're all thinking, 'how can he a little man when he's obviously tall?' He's one of those little guys hiding in a taller body. It's him, Kami and Nail standing on each other's shoulders!" I explained.

"0.0 THAT'S NOT TRUE!" Piccolo exclaimed. (**Thanx Shadowprincess-Shekailaia for both ideas.**)

"Yes it is. Now shut up so I can continue. I only have 2 more 'questions' to go. Piccolo… he really uses his antennas for radio contact." I said.

"_Hit me baby one more time_." Piccolo sang. "I mean, no I don't!" (**Thanx The super Saiyan jedi for the idea**)

"Oh yeah, very convincing. Anyway, Piccolo… he only uses Gohan to get to Goku so he can kill him the next time he tries to take over the world. °gasps° How could you kill the man you love!" I exclaimed. (**And thanx again Shadowprincess-Shekailaia for this idea**)

"I did NOT use Gohan to get to Goku to kill him! Gohan is my friend and I do NOT want to kill Goku OR take over the world!" Piccolo yelled angrily.

"Again the denial. You're lucky Nalurah's not here anymore. Well anyway, now you know Piccolo, the Mister Plushie kidnapping and blasting, Goku loving, marsian in a movie playing person who has an affair with Chichi and loves pink." I said as my voice disappeared.

"THEY DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME! COME BACK YOU! WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU!" Piccolo yelled as he ran off stage, stepping on Vegeta as he did so who was still lying on stage.

**Well that was it. Liked it? I hope so. The next one will be… BULMA! I'm gonna enjoy torturing her and I'm hoping you will to. Give me ideas in a review and I'll try to update next Wednesday or Thursday like usual. R&R!**


	5. Chapter 05: Bulma Briefs

**Hello people! I decided to update this one earlier (okay, only one day but who's counting) because I'm just the nicest person in the world.. okay, and because I had already finished this chapter last week but that's not the point here. Well you people didn't really give me any good ideas so I had to come up with em myself… well okay, so Nalurah helped me being a co-host and all. Hope you all enjoy this chapter. R&R!**

**Chapter 05: Bulma**

Bulma ran onstage looking for Vegeta since he was still lying on the ground from the last chapter. She tried to drag Vegeta offstage but he was too heavy and she decided to take a break, so she sat down on the Evil Chair of Doom.

"Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars." I said.

Bulma looked up at the ceiling, "Hello? Is someone there?" She asked.

"2 people to be precise." Nalurah said next to me.

"Oh good, then you can help me get Vegeta of this damn stage." Bulma said happily.

"Nah, we don't feel like it. He'll probably wake up somewhere in the middle of the interview anyway." I said in a bored tone, "Now let's start the questioning!"

Nalurah smirked evilly, "Best idea I've heard all day." She cleared her throat. "Bulma Briefs… she's really in love with Santa Clause. It's the red! Isn't it!" Nalurah said.

"Yeah, it's so sexy… but the pixies around him are just scary!" Bulma said.

"Uhm… well that was… uhm… never mind." I said, "Bulma Briefs… she's really a Kirby."

"Well that does explain the hair." Nalurah agreed with me.

"I am NOT a Kirby!" Bulma said a little angry, "And my hair is just natural this way."

"Riiiiiiiight, keep dreaming. Bulma Briefs… She's jealous of Mister Plushie." Nalurah said.

"What! No I'm not! He's such a cute little bear!" Bulma exclaimed.

Vegeta woke up, and looked at Bulma shocked, "You… You don't like Mister Plushie!" He then ran offstage crying.

"Vegeta! It's a lie! A lie I tell you!" Bulma yelled but Vegeta was already too far away.

"Well at least now you don't have to drag him offstage anymore." I offered, "Anyway, Bulma Briefs… she has no fashion sense." I said.

"WHAT! I HAVE THE BEST FASHION SENSE EVER! HOW DARE YOU SAY SUCH A LIE!" Bulma fumed.

"Uhu, then explain those clothes." Nalurah said.

Bulma looked at her clothes, she was wearing a neon orange sleeveless shirt and a bright pink mini skirt with blue sneakers. Her eyes widened in shock, "I WASN'T WEARING THESE!" She exclaimed.

Nalurah whistled innocently, "Authoress powers? I didn't use them." She said in a WAY to innocent voice. "Well anyway, Bulma Briefs… she tried to ruin Chichi but she's so bad at it, that she became her best friend."

"I AM her best friend! I'd never do anything to hurt Chichi!" Bulma exclaimed.

"Then why do you have all those chains and whips in your closet?" I asked, cocking my head to the side a bit.

Bulma blushed, "THAT'S PRIVATE!"

I shrugged, "Whatever, Bulma Briefs… she stole the cookie jar from chapter one. SO THAT'S WHERE ALL THE COOKIES WENT!" I exclaimed.

"I don't have any cookie jar." Bulma said innocently as she hid something behind her back.

Nalurah's eyes narrowed and she pushed a button. Onstage, mechanical arms appeared out of the chair and ripped the thing Bulma was hiding away from her.

"HEY! MINE! I NEED THOSE TO SURVIVE!" Bulma cried out but the mechanical arm just disappeared and reappeared with Nalurah and me.

"MY COOKIES!" I exclaimed happily, "Now I can give cookies again!"

Onstage, Bulma was crying, and rocking herself back and forth in the chair, "Cookies, must have cookies…" She whispered to herself.

"Well I guess that proves that Bulma is a cookie addict." Nalurah said.

"Yeah, oh well." I said, hugging the cookie jar.

Nalurah stared at me "… o…kay… let's move on, Bulma Briefs… she isn't a real scientist." Nalurah said.

"I am too! How else did I become so famous with all my inventions." Bulma challenged with a smirk, forgetting the cookie jar completely.

Nalurah shrugged, "You stole all the ideas from REAL scientists."

"Then why didn't any of them ever say something." Bulma asked.

"Because you killed them." I said simply, "With all those torture devices we already mentioned before."

Bulma's eyes widened, "I DID NOT!" She exclaimed.

Suddenly, a police squadron ran onstage with shotguns aimed at Bulma, "FREEZE!" one of them yelled.

"EEP!" Bulma let out a terrifying scream and the entire police squadron opened fire.

"Ok boys, finish this after we're done with her would you." Nalurah asked nicely.

"Sure!" They all replied smiling and left the stage, leaving a near death Bulma behind who somehow managed to get back into the chair.

"Damn, she's getting the chair all bloody! Oh well, I'll have it cleaned later. Bulma Briefs… she tried to kill Bra several times. How could you do that to your child!" I exclaimed.

"I DID NOT TRY TO KILL BRA!" Bulma yelled really pissed off now.

Vegeta ran onstage and slapped Bulma, "How could you!" He yelled, then ran offstage again.

Bulma stared at him in shock and then glared at the ceiling, "HOW DARE YOU SAY SUCH THINGS ABOUT ME!" She yelled.

"Because we like to." Nalurah replied simply. "Bulma Briefs… she only married Vegeta for his money."

"I DID NOT! I MARRIED HIM BECAUSE I LOVE HIM!" Bulma yelled.

"Sure, keep telling yourself that. Bulma Briefs… she's having an affair with Yamcha behind Vegeta's back." I said. "Not only a bad mother but also a bad wife." I shook my head in disapproval.

Yamcha ran onstage, being chased by Vegeta.

"HOW DARE YOU TOUCH MY WOMAN! I'M THE ONLY ONE THAT IS ALLOWED TO DO THAT!" Vegeta yelled **(Thanx Gohan'sUltimatePower for the idea)**

"I did NOT touch Bulma!" Yamcha yelled back.

Vegeta just ignored Yamcha's yelling and fired a huge ki-blast at him, killing him immediately.

Vegeta huffed, glared at Bulma and then walked offstage.

Bulma just stared at this whole thing with wide eyes.

"Well that was interesting." Nalurah commented.

"LET'S PARTY! YEMCHA'S DEAD!" I yelled happily.

Nalurah again stared at me, "Riiiiiiiiiiight. Anyway, that's it for today's interview so now you know Bulma Briefs, the Santa Claus loving, cookie jar stealing, daughter killing cookie addicted Kirby who has no fashion sense and is wanted by the police at the moment." She said as her voice faded and we both left.

"THEY DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME! I'M NOT COOKIE ADDICTED! Oh look! A cookie!" Bulma exclaimed as she ran offstage after a cookie that wasn't really there.

**Well that was it. Liked it? Hope you did and because I finally have my precious cookie jar again, I can start giving cookies to all the readers! °hands out cookies to everybody° Let's see, the next one will be… Trunks! Let's make it Mirai Trunks first and then I'll do little Trunks later. R&R and keep those ideas coming.**


	6. Chapter 06: Mirai Trunks

**Hello people, here I am again with the next chapter. I had a little trouble writing it since I didn't really have any ideas but I think the chapter still turned out very good. Enjoy and of course, R&R!****

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Chapter 06: Mirai Trunks **

A time capsule appeared out of nowhere onstage and lande don the floor. A confused looking Mirai Trunks stepped out and looked around him to see nothing but darkness, and chair. He shrugged and sat down on the chair for who knows why.

"Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars." Nalurah's voice sounded. Mirai Trunks… he died his hair, the original color is pink." All the fangirls gasped in shock.

"WHAT! My hair isn't pick and I never died it!" Trunks yelled. All the fangirls let out a sigh of relief.

"Don't buy it girls! I have pictures!" I said as some pictures floated down from the ceiling. Trunks caught them and looked them over.

"This isn't me. This is just some guy that vaguely looks like me with a wig!" he said.

"A lot of people are in denial lately, don't you think Leila?" Nalurah asked shaking her head.

"Yeah, it's a shame really. Mirai Truks… took ballet lessons from Vegeta." I said, "Well then you must be good since Vegeta is one of the best in the world."

Trunks looked up at the ceiling confused, "Okay, A: I don't do ballet and B: What the hell did you just say about my dad?"

"You don't know he's a world famous ballet dancer? Shame on Vegeta for not telling his pupil how good he really is." Nalurah said, "Well let's continue shall we. Mirai Trunks… he used to play big bird in Sesamy street."

Chibi Goten ran onstage with his autograph book and a hyper look on his face

"I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN! CAN I HAVE YOUR AUTOGRAPH!" he exclaimed jumping onto Trunks' lap and pushing the book in his face.

Trunks jumped up from the chair to get rid of Goten and stared at him as Goten fell on the ground on his butt painfully.

"Who are you!" Trunks demanded.

Goten looked up at him with tears in his eyes, "You… you don't recognize me?" then he started to cry.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I yelled, "How dare you make the cute little Goten cry!"

"Calm down Leila." Nalurah said, trying to cool me down.

"NO! I shall avenge Goten! POLICE!" I yelled. The police squadron from the last chapter ran onstage, pointing bazooka's at Trunks.

"What did he do!" the leader asked.

"He made chibi Goten cry!" I yelled angrily.

The police squadron gasped and saw Goten crying on the ground. One of them took Goten away from the fine of fire and left the stage as another yelled: "FIRE!"

The police squadron started shooting at Trunks as Trunks tried to deflect the bullets.

After about 10 minutes (don't ask me where all those bullets came from people), Nalruah got bored.

"Okay people, FREEZE!" she ordered.

The police squadron stopped shooting and looked up questioningly.

"I'm getting bored so you can finish him off after I'm done torturing him." Nalurah said evilly.

The squadron smiled, "Okay." Then left, leaving Trunks behind with ripped clothes and some injuries. All the fangirls in the audience fainted at seeing Trunks' nearly naked upper body.

"I will never get those fangirsl. Oh well, Mirai Trunks… he sleeps in pink bunny pyjama's." I said

"Then, why did you die your hair lavender? It used to match your pyjama's!" Nalurah asked confused.

"I do NOT sleep in pink bunny pyjama's - that's my dad! - And I did NOT die my hair." Trunks growled.

"Sure you didn't." Nalurah said sarcastically, "Mirai Trunks… he gave Goku a placebo pill instead of the real medicine during the android saga."

"I did not! Why did Goku recover then?" Trunks yelled smugly.

"Mirai Gohan came and brought it too him. He was never really destroyed you see, it was a to fool you." I said.

"And why would they do that?" Trunks asked.

"I'm getting to that! Mirai Trunks… he worked with the androids to destroy his time line." Nalurah said. **(Thanx Shadowprincess-Shekailaia for the last 2 ideas)**

"WHAT! I DID NOT! I HATE THE ANDROIDS!" Trunks exclaimed.

"Sure you do. Mirai Trunks… he has nobody to love." I said. All the fangirls in the audience woke up, "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwww."

"Hey that's not true! I've got my mother to love!" Trunks said.

"Mirai Trunks… is in an insect relationship with his mother." Nalurah continues, smiling innocently.

Trunks blushed, "You girls are crazy." he muttered.

"We know. Mirai Trunksl… he came here today to steal Mister Plushie." I said.

All the Mister Plushie fangirls gasped.

Vegeta ran onstage, smacked Trunks in the face and then started crying, "Who dare you! My own son!" he then ran offstage again, leaving a shocked Trunks behind.

"O…kay." he said, trying to process what just happened.

"Vegeta's been crying a lot lately, hasn't he." Nalurah asked.

"Yeah, guess he needs to catch up with all those years when he didn't cry. Oh well, Mirai Trunks… he doesn't know anything about woman." Nalurah said.

"I do too!" Trunks argued, pouting like a little chibi at which all the fangirls fainted once again. **(Thanx FallenAngel111586 for all 4 ideas)**

"Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight, keep telling yourself that and you'll never get a girl. Mirai Trunks… he always wanted to be like Hercule." I said. **(Thanx ssj4 Broly for the idea)**

"WHAT! I don't want to be like that bragging moron!" Trunks exclaimed.

"Then why do you have huge Hercule posters in your room?" Nalurah asked sweetly.

"What… How… But…" Trunks stammered, "How did you know?" he asked with wide eyes.

"I have my ways." Nalurah grinned evilly.

"… I'm not asking." Trunks muttered.

"You shouldn't. Mirai Trunks… he steals his sisters bras and wears them when nobody else is home while singing Madoona songs in front of the mirrir and doing crazy dances." Nalurah said grinning.

"And yes eople, we have it on video." I added.

A television with DVD-player appeared out of nowhere onstage. The DBD stared and Trunks was seen wearing a straplessred dres with a bra over it, singing 'Materil Girl', while doing some crazy dance.

Trunks truned as red as a beat and quicly send a kiblast at the t.v., completely destroying it.

Bra then ran onstage with a furious look on her face, "How dare you!."" She screeched and slpaaed Trunks in the face before running offstage again.

"You destroyed my t.v.!" I fumed. "Chill Leila, we have about 10 million more where those came from." Nalurah hushed.

"I DON'T CARE! HE WRECKED MY T.V.! I AM SUEING HIM!" I yelled.

"You're sueing me? I'm sueing you for telling all these lies about me!" Trunks exclaimed angrily, rubbing his sore cheek.

"Deal with it! Now you know Mirai Trunks, the pink haired, big bird playing, pink pyjama wearing, Mister Plushie stealing, bra and red strapless dress wearing demi-saiyan who wrecked my t.v. and is going to be sued for it after the police squadron outside is done with him." I said and my voice faded.

"THEY DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME! COME BACK HERE! I'M GONNA SUE YOU BEFORE YOU CAN SUE ME! I'LL FIND YOU!" Trunks yelled as he ran offstage where indeed, the police squadron was still waiting for him and opened fire on him.

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**So what did you think? Good, bad, hilarious, crap? Tell me please. The next victim… I mean contestant will be Satan Hercule. °grins° That'll be fun! Oh yeah, Nalurah has a fic of her own and it's really good. Will you people do me a favour and go read and review her fic? I know you want to so just go to search and type in 'Nalurah'! R&R!**


	7. Chapter 07: Satan Hercule

**Well I didn't get that many reviews people. What's wrong? Out of ideas? Ow well, me and Nalurah thought of the ideas for you people so hope you like this chapter and R&R!****

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Chapter 07: Satan Hercule**

Hercule walked onstage looking for Videl because she had run off with Gohan once again and he was getting sick and tired of it. He saw the chair of Doom standing on the middle of the stage with the text: "Chair of Doom" on it. He shrugged and sat down on the infamous chair because he is the dumbest person in the world and just a plain moron.

"Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars." I said.

Hercule looked up with a dumb look on his face, "H-hello? Who are you? A-are you a-a ghost?" he asked scared.

Nalurah and I smirked at each other, "Yes we are Hercule, and we have come to test you. If you fail our test, you shall die." Nalurah said.

Hercule shrank back in the chair out of fear. Nalurah's smirk widened, "Shall we begin Leila?"

"Yes, let's. Satan Hercule… he wears a thong."

Hercule blinked, "H-how did you know?" he asked.

"Ghosts know everything." Nalurah said, "Satan Hercule… he uses inflatable muscles so he's really just like a skippy ball."

"And it also explains how he won all those tournaments; the kicks and punches just bounced off him." I added.

"I do not have inflatable muscles!" Hercule said.

"Let's test that, shall we?" Nalurah whistled and a group of 5-year old kids ran onstage and started jumping on Hercule. They stopped after about 5 minutes, looked up at the ceiling and shook their heads to tell us Hercule had no inflatable muscles, then they ran offstage again.

"I guess you were right Hercule." I said to the bruised and slightly bleeding Hercule on the ground.

Hercule groaned in pain and sat on the chair again with a painful wince.

"Satan Hercule… he wears a wig." I said.

"No I don't!" Hercule said defensively.

The mechanical arm came out of the chair and pulled on Hercules hair which came off. Now, Hercule was seen bald.

"NOOOOOOO!" Hercule screamed as he tried to get the wig back from the mechanical arm which was to high for him.

"Nalurah, will you please give him back the wig? His baldness is scaring me." I said.

Nalurah nodded in agreement and gave Hercule the wig back which he immediately put on again.

"Satan Hercule… his favorite foods are socks and underwear." I said.

Hercule looked up at us with a sock in his mouth which he got from only Kami knows where, "Now Iw dow't!" he said

"I rest my case." I said.

"Satan Hercule… he likes to join Mirai Trunks in "Material Girl" dance." Nalurah said.

"And we also have a DVD of that people." I said as a t.v. with DVD player appeared on stage again. As the DVD started to play and Trunks was seen dancing with Hercule, Trunks ran onstage and fired a ki-blast at the t.v., once again demolition it.

"I AM SOOOOOOOOOOO GONNA SUE YOUR ASS OFF!" I yelled at Trunks.

"AND I AM SOOOOO GONNA SUE YOU BACK!" Trunks yelled at the ceiling before running offstage again.

"He's going to sue the ceiling?" Nalurah asked confused, "Those poor speakers." I sweatdropped

"Anyway, Satan Hercule… he runs around in flower fields on Sundays… naked." Nalurah said disgusted.

"And though we have proof of this as well, we are going to spare your innocent minds from the horror that we sadly enough have on tape." I said shivering.

Hercule turned beet red, "I-I…" he tried to defend himself but got no further than that.

"Let's go on before we get to terrified of the memory of the tape. Satan Hercule… he's not really Videl's father, he adopted her." I said.

Videl ran onstage crying, "Why didn't you tell me! Who are my real parents!" she demanded crying.

"Videl, don't believe the ghosts honey. They lie!" Hercule tried to hush Videl but she just slapped him in the face, knocking him of the chair and then ran offstage yelling: "I'm going to find my real parents! Farewell!"

"Tss, you're a very bad stepfather Hercule. Satan Hercule… he had a long relationship with the Easter bunny." Nalurah said.

"No I didn't! That was that blonde guy that used to hang around my Videl! Sharpner was his name I believe." Hercule said defensively.

Nalurah and at each other and burst into laughter. After about 5 minutes of hysterical laughter, we both stopped and wiped the tears from our eyes, "Let's go on before we start laughing again." I said, "Satan Hercule… he beat Cell."

Hercule - so used to denying everything Nalurah and I said to him - of course responded with: "No I didn't!"

A camera crew ran onstage, "So you say you did not defeat Cell." the reporter asked with a shocked look on his face.

Hercule blinked… he blinked again… he then realized what he had said and blinked once more.

"Uhm… Oops?" he said dumbly.

The reporters gasped, "Then who did!" the reporter demanded.

Hercùle, being to shocked to really say anything just said: "Uhm…"

The reporters stormed offstage to find out who had beaten Cell for real.

"Now that they're gone, let's continue with the test. Satan Hercule… he is pregnant with the Easter bunny." Nalurah said.

Hercule looked at the ceiling, "But… I'm a man… How can I be pregnant." he asked.

"I'm getting to that. "Satan Hercule… he's really a woman." Nalurah continued.

"NO I'M NOT!" Hercule yelled, momentarily forgetting that he was being 'tested' by 'ghosts'.

"HOW DARE YOU DEFY US!" I exclaimed in a creepy booming voice that scared the hell out of Hercule as he tried to hide behind the chair.

"MOMMY!" Hercule screeched in fear.

"No, she's not around. But we are." Nalurah said evilly.

Hercule gulped as the mechanical arm came out of the chair once more and lifted Hercule back into the chair.

"Now let's continue our little test. Satan Hercule… he lets Buu turn all his rivals into food so they can't beat him." I said. **(Thanx Small Lady Dodo for the idea AND GOHAN IS MINE!)**

"But… but… How am I supposed to win if I don't let Buu do that?" Hercule tried to defend himself.

"That's not really a good defence… uhm… let's just move on before he makes an even bigger fool of himself." Nalurah said, "Satan Hercule… he stole Videl's saiyawoman outfit and did his dumb poses in it in front of a mirror."

"No I didn't!" Hercule exclaimed.

"Everybody tries to deny stuff! Man, do we have to prove everything around here!" I said annoyed."

"Obviously yes, now where did I leave those pictures?" Nalurah looked for a while until she found several pictures of Hercule in the outfit in front of the mirror, "Here they are!"

Hercule turned red, "It was only that one time!" he tried but Nalurah just showed more pictured of other times. Hercule was now breaking the record of turning the most shades of red EVER. **(Thanx BlueNightGVZ2431 for the idea)**

"And now… it is time for our verdict." I said in a creepy voice.

"Indeed it is. Satan Hercule, you have… FAILED! You shall be punished with death!" Nalurah said in an even creepier voice.

Hercule paled and his eyes went wide, "But… but… NOOOOOOO!" he then ran offstage crying and screaming for his mommy while Nalurah and me just laughed like crazy people as our voices slowly faded away.**

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And that was it for this chapter. Hope you all enjoyed it and our next victim will be… Videl! I shall make her pay for taking away my precious Gohan! MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**


	8. Chapter 08: Satan Videl

**°Hides behind table as rotten fruit is thrown at her° I'M SORRY! I KNOW I DIDN'T UPDATE LAST WEEK BUT I'M REALLY SORRY! °people stop throwing fruit and glare as I come out of hiding° I was really tired since I went to a Yu-Gi-Oh sleepover tournament which meant NO sleep AT ALL and I was just way to tired to write this so I decided to postpone it 1 week. Besides, you people hardly review me and even if you do there are almost no ideas so it's partially your own fault. Now I'll start the next chapter before you all go mad on me again and start throwing fruit at me… again. R&R!**

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Chapter 08: Satan Videl**

Videl walked onstage looking for Gohan who I had kidnapped so nobody could have him except for me. She saw the chair, shrugged and wanted to leave again when the mechanical arms appeared once again out of the chair and pulled her into it. She screamed bloody murder but the only answer she got was the all famous:

"Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars." which I said in a very evil and sadistic voice.

Videl looked - well glared is more the word I'm looking for here – up at the ceiling.

"WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE! DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM! I AM SATAN VI-" Videl screamed but I cut her off.

"I know who you are! You stole MY Gohan away from me!" I spat back with loathing dripping of every word, "And because you stole him, you need to be punished!"

Videl's glare intensified, "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!"

"You'll see. Hey Nalurah? You wanna start the interview?" I asked in the same evil and sadistic voice I had used earlier.

"It would be my pleasure. Satan Videl… her idol is Malibu Barbie." Nalurah said.

"WHAT?" Videl screeched, "I don't idolize some stupid doll!"

"Yeah you do. Nalurah just said you did and for now, what Nalurah says goes." I smirked.

"I'll hold you to that Leila. The next time we're in an argument I'll use that against you." Nalurah said smirking as well.

"That's why I added the 'for now' part to that statement. Moving on, Satan Videl… she used a love potion to get Gohan. HA! I knew it! He doesn't really love you! He loves me! MEEEEEEEEEEE!" I said doing a victory dance.

"Uhm… no comment." was all Nalurah could say.

Onstage, Videl was screaming like hell to get loose and screeching that it wasn't true.

Gohan, who had somehow escaped wherever the hell I put him, ran onstage with a shocked expression on his face.

"You… you did WHAT?" he exclaimed.

Videl looked at him, "No! It's not true Gohan!" she said in a begging way. (**A/N: I am SO enjoying this people! MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**)

"Really?" Gohan asked.

Videl nodded.

"Okay." Gohan said as good gullible as he was and walked offstage.

"WAIT! Get me out of this damned chair first!" but Gohan had already gone back to wherever I put him in the first place.

"You really have to watch him. He escapes a lot." Nalurah complained.

"So? He almost believed me! Let's hope he conveniently appears again the next time I say something like that." I said cheery.

"Right… let's go on shall we. Satan Videl… she's really in love with Vegeta."

Videl's eyes widened in disgust, "I DON'T LOVE THAT ASS! HE'S HAS A FRIGGIN EGO THE SIZE OF JUPITER!" she screeched.

"Your point being?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

She once again glared at the ceiling but didn't say a word.

"That's what I thought. Satan Videl…" I started but before I could accuse her of anything, Trunks ran onstage, wrecked the one of my TV's that was standing there for no good reason, and then ran offstage again.

"Well that was random…" Nalurah said as she blinked.

"COME BACK YOU SON OF A BITCH! HOW DARE YOU WRECK MY TV WHILE IT'S NOT DOING ANYTHING! HOW COULD YOU HURT SUCH AN INNOCENT TV!" I yelled angrily.

Silence was all I got for an answer.

I glared angrily and then yelled, "SATAN VIDEL… SHE'S REALLY TRUNKS' SISTER BECAUSE THEY'RE BOTH INCREDIBLE ANNOYING AND I'M GONNA SUE THEM BOTH!" I then went off to sulk in a corner.

Nalurah stared at me and Videl stared at the ceiling as staring at me. I just continued to sulk.

"Uhm… Seeing how Leila is unable to go on for now, I'll just take over. Satan Videl… she's secretly married to mister Plushie."

Vegeta ran onstage crying, "But…but…but… WHY DIDN'T ANYBODY TELL ME MY PRECIOUS MISTER PLUSHIE WAS MARRIED!"

Then Gohan conveniently appeared onstage once again and stared at Videl in horror.

"Man, you really need to keep him on a leash Leila!" Nalurah said.

I immediately came out of my corner to see Gohan's reaction.

"How could you!" he exclaimed at Videl.

"I am NOT married to a stuffed animal!" Videl exclaimed back.

"HOW DARE YOU SPEAK OF MY MISTER PLUSHIE LIKE THAT" Vegeta yelled.

"SHUT UP!" Videl and Gohan yelled at once.

They continued to argue with Vegeta pouting a lot and sometimes defending his mister Plushie as all I could do ws stare at them with a huge smirk on my face, "It won't be long until Gohan is mine!" I cackled.

"Uhm… Leila? You might wanna look again." Nalurah said bored.

I looked back down to see Gohan and Videl kissing as Vegeta was still ranting about his stupid stuffed animal.

"HEY! That's not what's supposed to happen!" I exclaimed. I then quickly made Gohan disappear and started to sulk in a corner again.

Videl was now staring in shock at the spot where Gohan was seconds ago sa Vegeta was yelling at her for not inviting him to the wedding.

Videl got pissed, used all her strength to pull one arm out of the mechanical arm attached to the chair and hit Vegeta full in the face. Vegeta fainted.

"GO VIDEL! WHOOT!" Nalurah cheered as Vegeta hit the ground.

"HEY! You're supposed to be on my side!" I yelled from the corner.

"Yeah but I love seeing Vegeta get knocked out by a girl." Nalurah said smiling innocently. "Well anyway, Satan Videl… she doesn't have a father."

"What! I do too! My dad's Satan Hercule!" Videl said smugly.

"Yeah but we already found out he's a woman so you have 2 mothers but no father. Makes you wonder how you were created." Nalurah wondered.

"MY FATHER IS NOT A WOMAN!" Videl yelled.

"Keep dreaming. You're dad's a woman." Nalurah stated simply, "Now then, Satan Videl… she pretends to be a middle aged woman on the internet to attract older man."

"Videl's eyes widened in disgust and - as she's been doing this entire chapter – started screaming.

"Well I'm getting a headache from all the screaming and have no more 'questions' so now you know Satan Videl, the Malibu Barbie idolizing, potion brewing, Vegeta loving wife to mister Plushie who has no father and pretends to be a middle aged woman on the internet." Nalurah said as her voice faded away and she dragged me with her.

Onstage, Videl was still screaming like a madwoman and didn't notice until half an hour later that the mechanical arms had disappeared. When she did notice she ran offstage stepping on Vegeta who then got stuck to her foot and was dragged offstage like an old rag.

**

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°hides under the table again before making the following announcement° I am officially putting this chapter on hold because as you could all till from this chapter since it sucked, I'M OUT OF IDEAS! That and I want to focus on some of my other fics so I can maybe post something new. Anyway, PLEASE DON'T KILL ME! °gets mob of angry readers°**


	9. Chapter 09: Son Goten

**This chapter is written by Darka-Chan

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Chapter 09: Son Goten**

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Goten wandered around the studio looking for his brother and his father. 'I could've sworn they went here…' And then everything turned black.

As he opened his eyes, Goten found himself tied to a chair, facing a camera.

"Hey I'm on TV!" he grinned. "Hi mom!"

"Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars." A new voice says, letting the words echo through the room.

"Eh?" Goten looks around tilting his head slightly. "Who the hell are you?"

Evil cackling is heard, together with ChiChi yelling; "GOTEN! WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE!" and Goten 'meep!'ing, but that will all be ignored as we get back to the cackling. "As this is my first and last time here, I might as well tell you now… I am… The most feared… TOOTHFAIRY!" Insane laughter is heard, and Goten puffs his cheeks.

"You didn't give me money last week!" he yells.

"Duh, that's because I'm not the tooth fairy, I'm Darka-Chan." The voice says flatly.

"Oh." Goten mutters.

"Goten…" DC starts. "He loves Videl and wants to marry her."

Goten gasps. "What! No! She's Gohan's wife!"

"HOW COULD YOU, GOTEN!" Gohan screams from within the public. "YOU'RE TRYING TO STEAL MY WIFE! WHY! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!"

"I'M NOT! THIS PERSON IS LYING! THE TOOTH FAIRY IS LYING!" Goten yells back.

"I'M NOT THE FREAKING TOOTHFAIRY YOU IDIOT!" DC screams, before clearing her throat. "Goten… Stole his brothers make-up -1- and gave it to Trunks to feed to the ducks."

"GOTENNNNNNNNNNNN!" Gohan yells, transforming into a super sayajin.

"GOHAN! NO! IT WAS A ONE-TIME THING! I SWEAR IT WAS! IT WAS!" Goten yells scared -though who wouldn't be with an angry SSJ Gohan in front of them o.0;-

"I'M GONNA KILL YOU GOTEN!" Gohan yells, transforming to super sayajin 2

"YOU SAID YOU DIDN'T WEAR IT ANYWAY!" Goten yells in his defence, peeing in his pants.

"… oh." Gohan turns back to normal again.

"Goten…" DC continues. "Likes to pee his pants."

"NO I DON'T! I HAVEN'T DONE THAT SINCE I WAS THREE!" Goten screeches.

"Then why is your crotch wet?"

"… uhm…"

"Son Goten… Only fused as trunks as he wanted to look like him" –thanks to Angel4Buffy -

"WHAT? NO I DON'T! I LOOK BETTER THEN THAT UGLY MONKEY!" Goten yells.

"NO YOU DON'T YOU FILTHY HYPOCRITE!" DC yells back.

Trunks transports in front of Goten, an eye twitching. "_What_ did you just say?" he growls

"… Nothing?"

"Son Goten… Is actually bi-sexual and not only in love with Videl, but also with Trunks and a picture just isn't enough…" –also thanks to Angel4Buffy-

Trunks blushes and transports to Namek to hide himself.

"Right… Goten… Dyes his hair black because his real father is Piccolo and his original hair is green."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" come the shouts of Goten, Chi Chi and Piccolo.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Goku yelled. "CHICHI! HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME! AND PICCOLO! MY FRIEND! AND GOTEN! I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY SON!"

"YOU DIDN'T LOVE ME! YOU SAID SO YOURSELF! -2-" ChiChi screams back.

"BUT STILL!" Goku yells back.

"SHUT UP YOU!" DC yells. "THIS IS ABOUT GOTEN YA HEAR! GOTEN THE NAMEK!"

"I'M NO NAMEK!" Goten yells

"HE'S NO NAMEK!" Piccolo yells

DC flicks her fingers, and Goten's hair parts like the sea did for Moses, revealing… bald spots. "Damn, Goten. You should really watch your hair, now I know why it looks so disorientated." she murmurs.

Flicking her fingers again, the hair parts again, revealing two pale antennas.

"What do you get when you mix a human with a Namek?" DC starts. "A PALE ALIEN! MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

The audience is like; … wtf dude? O.O get the crack away from her!

DC clears her throat again. "To end this now so that I can smoke –stupid Leila for putting a non-smokers sticker on the door-… Now you know Son Goten; the bi-sexual Trunks and Videl loving toothfairy believer -Goten: HEY! THE TOOTHFAIRY EXISTS!- make-up ruining Trunks-wannabee pale alien that loves to pee in his pants."

"WTF? I'M NOT LIKE THAT!" Goten yells. "I'M NO BI-SEXUAL! I'M STRAIGHT AND I LOVE MARRON!"

"GOTENNNNNN!" Trunks growls, turning super sayajin on the poor Goten that is still tied to the chair which he just can't seem to get out off.

"Thank you for watching Know your Stars a la DBZ." DC says in a mysterious voice that starts to fade in the background, soon overlapped by the sounds of Trunks beating Goten up.

_

* * *

1 – check chapter 3, Son Gohan  
2 – check chapter 1, Son Goku_**

* * *

Darka-Chan: Well, ****Moondalian is gone, and I was bored, and she didn't have any ideas for the fic anymore, so I decided to update it for you and her.  
If you want this fic continued, then I suggest you try to give some ideas in a review -since Moondalian can't come up with any and I'm not going to keep updating for her-, preferably characters that aren't used yet. **

If you can, try to give tips for;  
- Brolly  
- Freeza  
- The Ginue force  
- Buu  
Or anyone else you can think of

Thanks, ne?


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